Friday, June 06, 2008

Cascading Sponsors, Leaving and the Dance of the Rubber Stamps

It might sound like a strange title ... but don't leave yet, all will be revealed.

Cascading Sponsors

Everyone who comes to the United Arab Emirates has either a visitors visa valid for 90 days, a permanent residence visa valid for up to three years or is an illegal immigrant.

For a permanent residence visa you need a job. Your employer is your sponsor. Once you have a sponsor, you can sponsor others.

I am Christina's sponsor. If we had children I would be their sponsor and so it cascades from one primary sponsor to numerous secondary sponsored individuals.

It's a tightly monitored system and a good effort at knowing who is in the country and having some control over what they do. Needless to say, you can't get a driver's licence, bank account, electricity account or anything much else without your sponsor's permission.

Your sponsor is responsible for you while you are here. That sends a shiver down the spine of most sponsors who are, therefore, more inclined to exercise control over their sponsored employees.

When you want to register your vehicle, you get a letter from your sponsor saying you work for them and have a contract etc. No letter, nothing happens. Period.

Rubber Stamps

Now, a letter here (also known as a certificate, clearance certificate etc) is not just a letter. To be valid it simply MUST have a rubber stamp imprint (like a seal) on the front of it and be an original. Anything without a stamped imprint that is not an original is just a piece of paper.

It's actually one of the few things done here that makes any real sense to me as it reduces the opportunity for fraud considerably. It also keeps thousands of Indians in jobs making rubber stamps ... and probably thousands more actually using them ... but I digress.

When you leave here you get an exit list from your sponsor and you have to get a stamped clearance certificate from places linked to your sponsor to show that you leave without any liability. This is my "Dance of the Rubber Stamps"!

Leaving the UAE (Harder than arriving)

Like you, I have a few Rules for Living that I try to abide by. Mine are based essentially on Buddhist philosophy and include doing as you would be done by (also a Christian/Muslim ethic). Therefore I always endeavour to:
  1. Treat others with courtesy and never be rude (especially to those considered underdogs)
  2. Be tolerant of others, even when they are the most stupid f%$#ing people on the planet (there's truck loads of them here!)
  3. Never unduly get my knickers in a twist over anything (based on the premise that if you wouldn't worry about it in 100 years, why worry now)

However, I have to tell you that even though I have been pissed about by experts for decades, restructured dozens of times, downsized, upsized, and dealt with more than a fair share of dickheads who were police clients, I've been very close to losing the plot recently. Probably closer than ever.

It's all because of he Dance of the Rubber Stamps.

When you leave, you have to cancel your various accounts like power and water, banking, have your house inspected, transfer the registration of your cars, cancel personal loans etc. This could and should be easy, but as is the way here, it isn't. In almost every case you need some type of document as proof with ... yes, you guessed it, a rubber stamp impression.

The problem is that nobody knows exactly what you want or how to do it. Even though tens of thousands of people leave the country and probably hundreds in the HCT leave every year, there is no solid systematic, fireproof procedure that anyone can tell you about.

Even the HCT staff responsible for these things give you a bum steer.

Most organizations tell half the story. So you go to one branch of the Al Ain Distribution Authority and can't finish your business because you didn't bring a photocopy of an identification document. You go to the another branch and nobody even asks you for such a copy, so you toss it in the bin as you leave.

In some cases the clearance document can't be made at the time, so you are asked to come back later to collect it. You've already driven for 10 minutes either way through Cannon-Ball Express traffic, risking life and limb just to visit the office once ... why would anyone sane do it again? But you go back and often go back again to pick up pieces of paper.

They can't be faxed, they can't be posted, you just have to go with the flow. At times it tests your mettle to the limit, as it did mine. On one occasion recently I had been to the office of a bank on five separate occasions. Finally, I had to collect a clearance certificate and five cheques of mine that had been unused. When I drove in the sixth time, the clearance letter was there, but not the cheques. When the "customer service officer" asked me to come back later to collect it that he couldn't possibly post it, I thought:

"Do you think I sit about on my fat ass all day just waiting for you to call me to come in an pick up a piece of effing paper?"

But fortunately said, "I don't know how you make a profit here. You aren't very good at what you do."

There are several other occasions I could tell you about, but I think you get the drift. The good thing is that it's almost done now and while I have gotten stressed and finished up with a headache, I have managed to remain dignified.

In the end, it's all part of the experience. And after all, wasn't that what we came for?

Only two weeks to go.

Robin

Thursday, May 29, 2008

... and, Some things I WILL Miss

I thought I'd put a bit of balance into this discussion because I don't want you to think that it's all negative here. Far from it.

I've told you about some of the things I won't miss and now I'll talk about some of the things I will miss.

I'll miss Al Ain city
. It's a lovely city sprawled out across a wide, flat area at the bottom of Jebel Hafeet which divides Oman and the UAE. Most of the main streets are wide, with divided roads whose median strips are populated with palm trees, grasses and small shrubs. They are clean and at any time of the year you can see gardeners tending plants and cleaners picking up any rubbish that's been left on the street.













There are no drunks stumbling about, graffiti is almost unheard of, and nobody here returns to their car to find someone has kicked in the side panels of your car. Vandalism here is very, very scarce as are street offences common in Australia.

We have some lovely friends. We'll certainly miss them although we intend to keep in touch and hope some will visit us from time to time. (There are too many to place their photos here)

Rosie, a lovely lady who cleans our house and irons our clothes will be missed. Not only for the valuable work she does, but because she is a friend.



















Our mansion. Although our house at Alice Springs is lovely, we'll miss our Arabic mansion tht has more room than we need, airconditioning that is very effective and cheap to run, and which is rent free. (Can't do much better than that eh?














Food prices and Middle East foods. The price of food, as is the case with most things here, is very much cheaper than in Australia. There's no shortage of anything and there are some lovely foods like date honey that are peculiar to the Middle East that are nice to taste.














Beer, a category of essential food, is not only a little cheaper than in Australia, it also comes in a 500mL can. (Eat your heart out.) Look at this shot of a can in an Aussie stubby holder designed for an Australian 375 mL cans. Now I'm being a bit dishonest here. I will miss the price, but it will be good to get back to light beer and smaller sizes. It's very easy to overdo it here.






















No tax on salary. I'll write that again ... NO TAX on salary. Everything you earn you keep. I'll certainly miss that.


Petrol prices. Petrol is so cheap here, you don't even have to bother about how much you put in your tank. 100 AED is roughly $30 AUD and you can fill your tank for 75 AED (60 L tank). Imagine that.


Well, that's just a glimpse. There are many other things I will miss and the misses outweight the won't misses, just to set the record straight.


Robin

Saturday, May 17, 2008

Some Things I Won't Miss

There are some things I won't miss when I leave the UAE.


For example, I won't miss having to deal with people over the telephone. Here's what happened when I telephoned the only available number I could find for Al Noor Hospital last Thursday:

  • I dial the number 7667666 ...

  • "Yes" says the person at the end

  • "Is that Al Noor Hospital?

  • "Yes"

  • "I'd like to make an appointment to see a doctor"

  • "Wait" Click and then I hear another line calling ...

  • "Yes"

  • "I'd like to make an appoint ..."

  • Click and another line is calling ...

  • "Al Noor Hospital"

  • "I'd like to make an appointment"

  • "What for?"

  • "To see a doctor (I think: what other $&*^%$# types of appointments do you have)?"

  • "You don't need an appointment. Where are you ... just come in?"

  • "Okay, thank you."

This is fairly normal in the UAE, but the Al Noor Hospital is a huge concern with a large complement of well qualified medical people covering almost every discipline; they can do earhole surgery to extract your brain, remove a tumour and push it all back in; they can fix broken hearts etc, and the ENT specialist who fixed my hearing problem was excellent.

My question is: If they can afford to outfit the hospital with the best medical equipment and specialists available on the planet, why can't they hire someone who can design, implement and monitor an appointment system and staff to run it?

Then there's the idiot drivers ... I've mentioned them previously. I won't miss them driving left to right across my path to turn right and all the other ills they perform that are life threatening.

Water wastage is horrifying here and it bothers me every time I see it. When you come from an arid zone like Central Australia, water discipline is second nature. Although we aren't short of water, if we overused the aquifer, we could be, so we look after our water supply. It's also expensive, so it's not good economics to waste it.

Here, I see water wastage every day. Just the automatic taps in washrooms (toilets) must lose hundreds of thousands of kiloLitres every day. Indian expats, who come from a country where water is abundant, leave hoses running and water gardens in the middle of the heat. I see overflowing tanks and water trucks washing footpaths with water.

Given that most of the water at Al Ain is produced in desalination plants up the coast, the consumption here also has a negative affect on such things as salt levels in the landmass and in the sea.

There is a long way to go in sustainable development.

The dusty skies here are quite a contrast to the blue, stark skies of home ... I won't miss them and have often wondered how much sand I have sucked in in three years. It doesn't seem to effect anyone, but I still wonder, given that sand is silica and silica grows crystals. Huuuum.

Robin